Noted Writings

Tag: lies

  • Love Clown

    You were like a drug

    No one knew about us

    I fancied myself in love

    Never let myself see it wasn’t enough 

    I forgot about you

    Even though back then 

    I thought I was in love with you

    Your name is in my everyday

    But when I hear it

    I don’t see your face 

    I wonder if you remember me

    I’m sure you thought I was easy 

    Nothing about what we did was good

    I think I did it because I could

    All it was was hook ups

    Across the street

    In your truck

    I’m sure you were using me

    As I was an emotional wreck 

    And you just up and left each time

    Years later I tried to keep in touch

    You gave excuses, never replied

    I was hopeful, probably too much

    I let you let me down

    I thought the past could return

    I’ve always been a love clown

    I’m now forgetting the things

    That drew me to you

    I really had gone a little mad

    Wanting what the rest of the world had

    Single and older, I’m writing this

    Ignorance is really bliss

    I can see manipulation easier now

    I wonder why I remember you somehow

  • The Wall

    Junior year

    Fresh from his lies

    I was still 16

    A girl who lost her starry eyes

    You were of age

    According to the law

    Signed your name on a page

    That enlisted you the next fall

    As you were getting ready

    I was holding too tightly

    I sent texting shortcuts to be coy

    You said they were annoying

    I haven’t used them like that since

    It’s been years, over ten

    Tonight, I thought about you

    I’m still alone in life

    I know for you that’s not true

    A friend showed me your wife

    Funny how you said you were gay

    That you couldn’t ever love me

    I question myself thinking of that day

    Why couldn’t you say it was just me

    I’ve been scared of love

    Because of him and you

    To you I wasn’t enough

    So you lied, and he did too

    Now it makes me mad

    Because to you “gay” was an excuse

    To get me to step back

    Make me let go of you 

    I can’t just let the past go

    Be okay with that game

    If you wanted to be left alone

    Why couldn’t you just say?

    So hey, Chris, fuck you

    Because I deserved the fucking truth

    Honestly, I’m actually over it

    I’m writing this to break the wall

    I can’t remember your last name

    But I know it’s now harder to fall

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